Having Favourites

[collissimon]

I would argue that having a camper, or campers that you get along with better than some others is an inevitable part of being a camp counsellor, along with homesickness and yet another squabble over the latest fad, including Yu-Gi-Oh and Pokemon. This is due to what happens in other social situations: sometimes different people gel better than others, and counselling is no different.

Being inevitable, there is nothing wrong with this; you can have a really good summer if a couple of kids in your bunk are on your wavelength. The issue only arises if this is to the detriment of the other campers. The best way to avoid this is probably to be aware of it. If you are conscious of favouritism, is means that you can take steps to avoid it. You could spend time concentrating on the other campers as well, for example. Or do a group activity where everyone can get involved equally.

The other side of this coin, I think is to realize that you can’t be all things to every child: you can’t have that amazing relationship that completely turns a child’s summer around with every child. Some children won’t connect with you as well as others. The thing to bear in mind, is that you can still have fun with them, and still be a part of their summer, even if you don’t feel you are their summer.

[Dave]

Nice article! It is hard to stick with a favorite camper less than others, but it has to be done. It's when you're also the camper's favorite that things get tough, because then he/she will be hanging around you all the time and the other campers might get the impression you're hanging around him/her.

[camper]

i agree. i know there are 2 kids in my bunk that i speak to every day...i'm really close w/them. and they're definitely by far the "best campers" in my bunk. that doesn't mean i don't love the other 5 as much and i would never let the 2 that i'm closest with know that i'm closest w/them...they're just the most mature ones right now. when the others grow up a little i'm sure i won't really have "favorites" anymore. every counselor has favorites, the key to being a good counselor is how well you can hide it.

[Dave]

It isn't easy to hide it, that's for sure. :P Luckily I got to see my favorite kid from my first bunk last summer. He wasn't in my bunk so I got to talk to him a lot whenever I saw his bunk.

[rockinsmiles]

I think sometimes it is easier to hide favoritism than it is to hide your annoyence with some campers :laugh2: You know i kind of felt guilty about having favorite campers but then i realized there is nothing wrong with it (as long as of course none of the campers know it). i mean its not like your their parent or that you get to choose your campers.

[Skater Bubbles]

Ya it's hard not to play favorites. I figure that as long as the campers have no clue what's going on in your head it doesn't matter. Right now I am thinking of two girls that I had in my cabin last summer both in different sessions and they were my favorites, but I am the only one that knows that, none of my girls have a clue. On the flip side I can think of two girls who I would never want to have in my cabin again!!! But they don't know that.

[Flukie]

I had a really hard time this summer. I've had one camper since she was entering the 6th grade and I was her CIT. I later had her as a camp when I was a counselor. The summer I stopped going to camp, she did as well. This summer, when she heard I was back at camp, she decided to come again as a CIT. Surprise. I was the CIT director.

I also had two other CITs that I had previously as campers in the group. So I knew 3 out of 6 entering the summer. But the one I've known for 6 years... Man. We see each other in the off-season, I was her Silver Award Consultant, I'm her Senior GS advisor this year... So obviously that bond is really strong. We talked before camp, and I think it went really well. It definitely was hard - and in some ways, it may have looked like I was favoring her because I can completely read her. She can't keep anything quiet from me - I know her moods, her facial expressions, her breaking points. As a director, that was fantastic cause I really knew her. But it also made it tough!

[CAMPFRIEND]

Last week I got the chance to work with campers during a school break program. We work with a lot less campers than we do over the summer, so it gives me more time to spend with the campers and staff. It was interesting to see how some of my counselors did have campers that they liked better. It made me think about how I do the same thing as they do.

I think that we all have our campers that we like the best, and that will never change. No matter how hard we try!

[campCardinal]

Man, I can think of 2 campers that were my favorites of all time. I've had each of them in my cabin and they come back to camp every summer. Both are no longer in my unit. However, we have a special bond. Both of them are just very mature and their love for camp is very exciting. As a counselor it's fun to have those campers that keep coming back and remember everything that you did. In fact, their counselors told me that they kept talking about me and what they did last year. It's very rewarding to hear how your campers praise you.

[Dave]

As a counselor it's fun to have those campers that keep coming back and remember everything that you did. In fact, their counselors told me that they kept talking about me and what they did last year. It's very rewarding to hear how your campers praise you.
That same situation happened with me last summer. When I first saw one of my kids from the previous summer (who happened to be my favorite), he remembered our little inside joke. It was nice that he still remembered it after all those months. And his counselors always told me the entire bunk would always talk about me (most of the entire bunk from the previous summer stayed together). I've told the story about how they'd chant my name when I'd walk into the lunch room before. That was awesome.

[collissimon]

I had a camper from 04, who came back last year in a higher unit. It still made me grin when he went by and told my campers to not play up because their counsellors were really cool when he was a right little monkey the summer before!

[CAMPFRIEND]

You have to love when campers know you and help you out like that. I think it's funny how kids can change over a year.

[code3cadet]

I had a camper that I had for 2 mouths in my cabin. the first week he did not like his counsler so he asked to be in my cabin I got him in. at first he did not like the kids in the cabin because they are all nine and ten and he is 11. the kids were being domb one day and one kid told this kid that I was a mean counsler. the kid look at the other kids and told them that they are being bad kids and John is not fun when they are bad. he told them if they just lisen to what John tell them to do and not be punks that they would have all the fun in the world. what you are doing now is being butt heads so He will not be fun. I like this kid even before he did this. this was the last week that he was at camp. and the kids know that i liked him more then all of them but I told them that he was my cuson and that is way like him. the kid told all the kids that he was my cusan too

[Dave]

You have to love when campers know you and help you out like that. I think it's funny how kids can change over a year.
I agree with that. I had a few kids last summer do that as well with me. It was cool. :)

[Skater Bubbles]

It is sooooo hard not to like on ecamper better than the other, especially when they keep coming back year after year!!!

[code3cadet]

ya I know. I always have one. and all the kids know it. I try not to show it but I do

[Skater Bubbles]

I don't think any of my campers have ever caught on that I have a favorite each session, not even the kid that is my favorite knows it. I think it is partly because I have 9 year old girls and partly cause even though they are my favorite I don't do much about it.

[code3cadet]

I have 9 to 10 year old boys and they know. . I am not good at hideing if I like some one better then another guy. I e-mail all of the camper that I like every day.

[camper]

as far as i know, my campers don't know who my favorite is.

[Dave]

My favorite kid knows he's my favorite. But I don't think any other kids know.

[CAMPFRIEND]

I think that we all have our favorite campers. I know that over my years I have gotten a few.

[who_stole_my_loofa]

i definitely have favorite campers. i try so hard not to let it show- i dont like give them special privileges or anything.. but the season kids tend to get special treatment from any counselor just cause they know them better.

[code3cadet]

it is all right loofa. we are all human. Not me :cool: